What does it mean? “Dante…Dante’s death mask…YES!”įrom then on, nearly every line picked out of the movie for the trailers precedes to narrate what is happening in the plot. We see him go through some rapid-fire earnest mental detective work. “Dante defined our modern conception of hell… 700 years ago,” Hanks/Langdon mansplains to co-star Felicity Jones, checking out a slide-projector-rendering of a painting, which Foster had a picture of in his pocket. What’s the secret Foster died to protect? Oh man, it’s some dark shit, for sure - but you’re gonna have to stick around for a bunch of analyses of paintings before you find out! Also, there’s going to be a bunch of Hanks-as-Langdon talking about the text after which Brown shamelessly named the novel, Dante’s Inferno. One can see why from one viewing of its busy-as-hell, perpetually ludicrous trailer, which begins with Ben Foster (where my Flash Forward fans at?) seemingly in age makeup, dropping to his death from the top of a building. Inferno, the Hollywood goon squad seems to have declared, is much more ripe for the box office. That appears to have been abandoned during development, or was just turned in too late. If you know anything about the Brown oeuvre, you may wonder what happened to the proposed adaptation of The Lost Symbol, the third novel in his Robert Langdon series, which also includes his millions-selling The DaVinci Code and Angels and Demons. You couldn’t have bargained for it, but for the price of admission, you got a screening of the year’s greatest comedy thrown in with the deal: the “Official Trailer” for the newest Tom-Hanks-starring, Ron-Howard-directed Dan Brown adaptation, Inferno.
If you’ve been to a PG-13-or-up dramatic film in a multiplex recently, you may well have been granted a rare gift.
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